Am I an alcoholic and/or addict?

Am I an alcoholic and/or addict?

Take a quick look below if you would like to and see if any of this resonates with you. 

Physical Allergy – Once you take one of any mind-altering substance you cannot say with any certainty when you will stop, you typically take more than you planned to and you often end up in places you do not want to be.  This physical compulsion or phenomenon of craving is set off by the first one and can go on over varying lengths of time. 

Mental Obsession – No matter the disasters and wreckage you have experienced in your life as a direct result of taking mind altering substances you inevitably arrive back to a place where taking a mind altering substance seems attractive.  You are unable to draw on the memory of the disasters that occur every time you take a mind-altering substance as a defense against doing it again.  You take the first one thus setting the Physical Allergy in motion typically ending in unhappiness and varying degrees of disaster. 

Spiritual Malady – If the word “Spiritual” turns you off or is uncomfortable I understand, it has had the same effect on many including myself.  However, I encourage you to read on and see if this still makes sense for you.  I have a spiritual malady or some kind of natural disconnect from this planet and other people.  The best way I can describe it after years of sober reflection is the following.  When I wake up in the morning, naturally left to my own devices everything inside me has always leaned towards cheating, lying, stealing, cutting corners, and avoiding responsibility.  I like short cuts and bright flashy things that feel good but burn out quickly I am not comfortable having honest, up front conversations with people about how I feel and can rarely maintain a healthy relationship for a long period of time.  Essentially, I find the day to day things that I see other “normal” people seemingly do with relative ease to have a decent comfortable life absolutely excruciating.  I cannot seem to do them consistently for any length of time and I typically find myself unhappy in a life that just does not seem to suit me.